i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
