That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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