We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
