Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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