Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
