I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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