A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
nutella sex= disaster
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
