Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
