whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Randomize
