But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
