I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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