Christians are straight up FREAKS
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
