the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
