I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
