We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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