my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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