He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
im holly from the hills drunk
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize