she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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