i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
