are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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