yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
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