I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
