Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Who died my cat blue again?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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