are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
