i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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