But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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