Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
