I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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