What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
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