Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Just high enough for therapy.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
