She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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