That's when you crack a 10am beer
I don't think brook has ever known best
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
