Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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