Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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