i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize