Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(704): View more from North Carolina

my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'

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(254): View more from Texas

Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?

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(207): View more from Maine

so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.

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(850): View more from Florida

Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.

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(760): View more from California

Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes

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(248): View more from Michigan

Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?

(1-248): View more from Michigan

I don't know what to say

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding

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(912): View more from Georgia

I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.

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