I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
The feeling are messing with the penis
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize