I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Your penis caused this!
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
