She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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