your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
