omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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