I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
