well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
His nipple licking is glorious
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