Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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