ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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