i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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