Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
