Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Randomize
