Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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