My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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