I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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