You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Randomize
